Give the people you love a plan, not a scramble.
A guided process for making the decisions that turn scattered documents into a plan for a crisis or end of life that spares your loved ones the burden of guessing your wishes.
You may have watched this happen to a parent or another loved one.
Maybe you experienced a sudden loss, or watched a long decline that wore everyone down. Without a complete plan in place, what stays with you is how many decisions needed to be made, from which treatment and which facility to who to call and what to share.
Many of these decisions had to be made without knowing what your loved one would have wanted. Some were pure logistics, digging for passwords or searching for contact details stored only in a locked phone.
Some were heavier questions, like how best to hold vigil and how to honor the life that was lived. The burden of guessing fell to loved ones who were already struggling in the face of the crisis.
When it comes to making your own plan, it can be hard to begin. A generation ago a plan was a will and a file folder. Now, our lives are far more complex and fragmented, and we often have fewer people close enough to easily share the weight. There is more to manage than the old method was built to handle.
A good plan needs to meet the complexity of our lives. Whether you are planning ahead or a health scare or other situation has made this urgent, you can put a plan in place that your loved ones can actually act on.
Most tools help you organize what you already have. The hard part is the decisions.
The Before Plan is a guided process that helps you both organize important information and make decisions that will allow those you love to carry out your wishes without guessing.
There are several good tools for organizing documents, but when you hit a hard question about how you want something to happen or who to trust with it, it is easy to give up. The Before Plan blends the organizing and deciding together across legal, medical, practical, and personal choices. That is the difference between a usable plan and a pile of paperwork.
You can do this on your own, with a partner, with your extended family, or with a group of close friends. The Before Plan brings you the expertise required for a complex topic, and a commitment to help you get from here to ready.
A handful of sessions, and a plan that gets finished.
Most plans come together over two to four sessions, each 60 to 90 minutes, in person or virtual, spaced to fit your life. Straightforward cases with some homework take as few as two. When there is more to work through, we take the time it needs.
Start by getting your bearings.
You start by answering a few questions about your situation, what matters most, and what "done" means for you. A first session assesses what you have done so far, if anything, and uses your specific situation to determine the most important components of a plan for you.
Work through the process together, in focused sessions.
Sessions move through the legal, practical, and personal pieces in an order that builds on itself. Organizing and deciding happen together. You bring your life. The process brings the structure, the questions, and guidance on the "what ifs" that come alongside hard decisions.
Your legal documents will be produced through a lawyer or trusted online legal service, depending on your needs. The Before Plan never replaces your attorney. It makes sure the legal pieces get finished and fit together with the rest of your plan.
Reflect, review, and finalize.
Sometimes, tough decisions are best met with some space. Looking across your full plan before finalizing is an important step to confirm your choices or make adjustments that may rise up upon reflection.
Be ready and refresh as needed.
You leave with the whole plan ready for use. Your legal documents, a practical master file your trusted contacts can use, an inventory of your assets, a plan for your digital life, and your personal wishes for care, vigil, funeral, and memorials in place. The Before Plan will capture your most likely areas for updates and check in for updates over time, because an up-to-date plan is the best gift you can give.
Why I do this work
Like a lot of people, I have recently had to scramble through decisions in the middle of early crises and end of life, and I have seen firsthand how heavy the burden of an incomplete plan can be.
As a partner at McKinsey, I learned to bring order and drive decisions in tangled, high-stakes situations, and to facilitate sensitive, difficult conversations. In my training as an end-of-life doula, I learned how to sit patiently with the hardest questions and honor the deepest wishes of an individual facing their own mortality.
The Before Plan grew out of what I learned in my career, what I have experienced with my loved ones, and a real determination to spare others the scramble. I believe work this important deserves expert guidance, and I would be honored to guide you and the people you love through yours.
Begin with a few questions.
The easiest place to start is to answer a few questions about what you already have in place. It takes about five minutes and you get an honest read on where you stand today and what gaps exist. From there, you can use the list to work on the missing pieces yourself or we can work through it together.
If you already know you'd like some help, or you want to explore your unique situation, please reach out below. A virtual conversation is an excellent opportunity to see if The Before Plan might be the right fit for your needs.